My Defenses Hit the Ground
by MissSingItAll
Summary: When Edward left, it destroyed Bella's self-esteem. Now that he's back, will he be able to prove his love for her with the very real threat of Victoria in the distance?
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone! This is not my first fic, but it is the first one I've written in a while. I used to write fics about Sailor Moon, one of the awesomest animes ever! Well, now I have caught the Twilight bug and have started writing several stories, hopefully for your enjoyment.

So this story is about my favorite angst-ridden time period ever: Edward's departure in New Moon! I'm truly addicted to fics like this, so I decided to try and write my own version.

Hope you guys like it!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or anything related to Twilight. Stephenie Meyer owns all.**

* * *

**Bella POV:**

They're back.

The one family I thought I'd never see again. The one family that I knew I could never be a part of.

I realized not long after _he _left me there in the woods that I should have seen it coming. I was holding _him, _all of them back from everything. I was a weak, pathetic human that no one wanted to babysit and protect. And now, looking at them across the cafeteria at their usual table, this fact was more apparent.

I pulled the hood of my jacket over my mess of brown hair and sunk lower into the corner I was sitting in, alone. Mike, Jessica, and all the others tended to shy away from me now, which was fine by me. I didn't deserve friends.

I contented myself with staring at my knees, knowing that all their eyes were trained on me. I could feel their stares from across the room, curious and hesitant. After a few minutes of staring at the fabric of my jeans, I felt a presence beside me. I already knew who it was.

"Bella?"

"Hello, Alice," I mumbled. I looked up at her slowly through my hair.

There she was, radiant as ever. Her petite figure was slightly hunched over in my direction, and when she met my full gaze she gasped. A look of shock painted her features, followed by a flash of anger, then - and I detested this the most - pity. Her topaz eyes filled with concern.

"Are you...okay?" she almost whispered. I scoffed. Shaking my head, I looked away from her.

"What do you think?" I said in a hard voice. There was silence for a few moments. I finally turned my head back to her to see if she would respond. Her eyes were downcast and sad.

"Well...I would like it very much if you came to sit with us," Alice whispered brokenly. I automatically glanced over at their table.

Their inhuman beauty never ceased to amaze me. Rosalie and Emmett were sitting so close together that their arms were touching, and her hand was wrapped firmly in his. Rosalie had a look of indifference on her timelessly beautiful face, her golden blonde hair piled on top of her head. Emmett looked solemn with his body slumped over instead of sitting proud and strong. Next to Emmett was Jasper, who was sitting next to Alice's empty seat. A pained look was written across his face and his brow furrowed with confusion.

Lastly..._Edward. _The purple shadows under his eyes were more prominent as he gazed almost past me, looking at me as if I weren't really there. A few strands of his tousled bronze hair fell over the wide expanse of his forehead, and I wanted nothing more than to brush them away. His toned arms hung limply at his sides and stretched past the edge of his dark grey wool jacket. Going over his entire appearance, I saw that he looked...miserable. I couldn't guess why; he seemed perfectly fine when...he left.

"I don't think that's best," I replied, looking back at Alice. She nodded once.

"I knew you'd say that," she muttered, and I almost laughed out loud because she _would _know, what with her ability to see the future. "But really, Bella. We all missed you. You should at least come and say hi."

"Maybe some other time." I couldn't talk to them, not yet. I slowly stood and straightened up. The hole in my chest was prickling painfully, and I started to breathe heavily. My arms wrapped around torso, trying desperately to stop myself from splitting in two.

"Okay, Bella. I understand. But I want you to know that we do all love - " I didn't hear the rest of what she was saying due to the sharp gasp that left my lips. The hole was full on burning now, and I started to hyperventilate. My breath came in short, painful spurts. I almost watched in slow motion as Alice's eyes widened and she began to reach for me. I couldn't breathe, but I knew that I had to get out. So I pushed past her and ran all the way to the doors leading outside. My eyes were stinging with tears and I let go of my body to search for my keys. I ran blindly, splashing into the shallow puddles that lined the sidewalk. Eventually I caught sight of my big, red truck in the last row of parking spaces. I wrenched the door open and threw myself inside. Shutting the door loudly, I collapsed over the steering wheel and began to sob uncontrollably.

Love. Alice was about to say that they loved me. This was a complete and total lie. Why would they love me? I was a huge burden to their lifestyle. I had to be constantly saved and protected and watched over. If they truly loved me, they would have never left to begin with. All lies.

I don't know how long I sat there, my face wet with tears and my voice hoarse. Suddenly, I heard the bell ring, signaling the end of the day. The students poured out of the doors and made their way to the parking lot. I leaned back in my seat and took a deep breath. I put my key into the ignition and my truck roared to life. As I turned around to start pulling out of the parking space, I saw _them _standing there by the infamous Volvo. They were all staring at me. Alice looked sorry, and there next to her stood Edward. He had the strangest look on his flawless face. The others, apart from Edward, looked sad as they leaned against the car. I quickly turned around and proceeded to pull out of the space, never looking back at the family that had left me behind.

**Edward POV: **

As I watched Bella drive off the property, I felt my dead heart sink even lower. I had broken her. I had broken her and stomped on the pieces. She looked so lost and it devastated me even more to know that I was the cause of it. When Alice spoke to her in the cafeteria, she sounded timid and bitter. Her chocolate brown eyes were not bright and deep as I remembered, but dull and lifeless. Bella seemed to fold into herself, leaning meekly against the wall.

This was all my fault. In all honesty I thought that our leaving would help Bella. I wanted her to have a happy, free, normal life. I wanted her to grow and see the world, have children, be able to get everything she deserves. She couldn't do this with me and my dangerous family. I let my angel go, only to watch her fall.

We came back to Forks at the insistence of Alice and Carlisle. But deep down I knew that I would have returned for Bella on my own eventually. I could barely function without her. I took to sitting in my room, curled up in a ball on my black couch. I didn't read or listen to music. My piano remained untouched. After some time, when I desperately needed to hunt, I just ran. And kept on running until I was far from the family. I traveled to different countries, trying to escape the pain. Eventually, I settled on tracking Victoria, just simply to have something to do. She was still out in the world wreaking havoc, and I needed something to throw myself into, where I could leave my thoughts. However, I wasn't really good at tracking, and soon gave up and returned home after being begged by Esme. But everyday, my resolve grew weaker and the pull to go to Bella tugged constantly at my heart. Our return was inevitable.

_Edward? _Alice's voice cut through my mind. _I'm sorry. Let's go home._

I simply nodded and slid into my Volvo wordlessly. The others followed suit. It was in the silence of the car that their thoughts started to bombard me.

_My God, we never should have left. _Alice was very upset, her thoughts sporadically flipping from one thing to another.

_She looks terrible. Edward, man, look what you did. _Emmett's blunt words danced through my mind.

_I hate to say this, but I pity the poor girl. _Rosalie surprised me with the faintest trace of sympathy in her thoughts.

_I have never felt such pain, Edward. A human shouldn't be able to tolerate it. _Coming from Jasper, this only confirmed the damage I had caused.

We finally pulled up to the house and everyone exited the Volvo except for me. I allowed myself to sit there, staring forward blankly and letting my self-hatred fester. I didn't deserve any sympathy; not after what I had done to my angel.

* * *

A/N: Aw, poor Edward! Well, you know what to do. Please review so that I can get better!


	2. Chapter 2

Here's the next chapter! Thank you so much for your wonderful responses to this story! It definitely encouraged me to continue writing. I actually have the whole thing written out in my notebook, so updates should be more frequent than if I was writing from scratch.

Enjoy!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own Twilight.**

**

* * *

**

**Bella POV:**

Later that night, as I finished the rest of my homework, it started to rain. I looked out my window as I heard the raindrops pelt the roof of the house. The sky was a bluish-grey and the rain fell straight and steady, saturating everything with moisture.

For some strange reason, this sight moved me. Without thinking, I stood and left my room. As I passed Charlie's room, I could hear loud, bellowing snores coming from behind the door. _Good, _I thought. I didn't want to worry Charlie any more than I already did at dinner tonight, where I sat silent and unresponsive. I could tell he knew something had changed about me, but he didn't say a word as I cleared his dishes and headed up to my room. Knowing that he was deeply asleep, I headed downstairs.

Without putting on a coat or even shoes, I opened the front door as quietly as I could. The sound of the pouring rain filled my ears as I shut the door quickly behind me. My bare feet made contact with growing puddles of water as I made my way out to the front yard. I didn't feel the cold or the moisture. I just kept on walking in the rain, feeling numb. When I eventually stopped, it was like everything was real again. I shivered as I felt the cold of the rain run down my arms. I was only wearing a thin t-shirt and cotton pajama pants, which now stuck to my body. I turned slowly to look where I had ended up, and my heart clenched painfully in my chest.

I was standing on the edge of the forest where _he _had left me.

It was like everything came crashing down on me all at once. I gasped for air and I sank to my knees into the mud and grass. I couldn't tell that I was crying; the rain was mixing with my salty tears. My sobs cut through the rain's steady sound. I was cold, and I was alone.

"WHY?!" I screamed, my throat aching with strain. I looked straight up into the sky, letting the rain smack me in the face. My chest heaved and I fell over onto the ground. I curled up into the fetal position, trying desperately to hold myself together. The rain poured on.

* * *

Pulling into school, I lazily wiped my nose with the back of my coat sleeve and sniffed. My little late night escapade had gotten me a cold, and now I had to suffer through the day with a sore throat, runny nose, and pounding headache. Sighing, I grabbed my things and left my truck.

I trudged through the puddles and muck while avoiding the eyes of the other students. I didn't socialize with anyone, even less so than when I first moved here. As I passed through the doors to enter the main hallway, the dim fluorescent lighting messed with my vision. Before I knew it, the ground was coming up towards me. I braced myself for contact with the floor, but it never came. It took me a second to realize that I had been caught, and now a cold pair of stone arms were setting me back on my feet. I was afraid to look up, but I knew who exactly was standing there.

"Bella?" I felt a hand brush against my cheek, then rest up against my forehead. "You're burning up. You really shouldn't be at school today."

I stared at the floor, my feet, the other students, the lockers. Anything but the source of the velvet voice. Anywhere but _him._

"Bella, are you listening to me? Bella?" His hand moved from my forehead to my chin, and gently but firmly pulled my face to look at his. I couldn't help but be stunned as the sharp golden color of his eyes pierced through my own. His eyes were filled with concern, and his forehead was crinkled in confusion. It was only then that I realized how close we were touching, his cold body pressed lightly against mine. I still hadn't answered, and my eyes were starting to tear up as I thought about how much this moment was like times before.

"I'm fine," I mumbled, and I forced myself out of his grip. He dropped his hand, his concerned eyes widening slightly.

"Are you sure? You really do feel sick." His voice was too caring, too sweet and comforting. It broke my heart all over again. I felt a tear slide down my cheek and I took in a shaky breath.

"Oh Bella," he sighed. He reached toward me again, his messy bronze hair highlighted and glowing in the dim light.

"I have to go," I said abruptly, cutting him off from his actions. I turned around quickly, and, without a word, headed off to my first class.

* * *

Lunch was no longer a place of peace for me. Not since they came back. As I walked in the cafeteria, I saw them all sitting there again. I was about to pass by them to go to my corner when I heard my name being called. I looked around and...oh no.

Alice was waving me over, nearly falling out of her chair trying to get my attention. I sighed. _I might as well get this over with._

"Bella, come sit!" Alice exclaimed. She pointed to a chair next to her. I was about to sit when I saw who was sitting on the other side of the chair. Edward.

"Um, no thanks," I said quickly.

"Oh, come on! Sit with us!"

"What do you want, Alice?" I nearly growled. Alice stopped moving around, and a solemn look grew on her face.

"Well, I just wanted to talk with you, that's all," she trailed off. I felt slightly bad about snapping at her, but she just didn't understand that I wasn't ready for this.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I just...can't."

"Please, Bella? I've missed you." My patience was at its end.

"Then why didn't you write? Or call? Why didn't you make an effort to keep in touch? I would have liked at least a little reassurance that _someone _cared about me." Her jaw dropped at my outburst. The entire table looked at me in shock.

"Or even better, why did you leave in the first place?" I wanted to stop talking, stop hurting them, but the words kept on spewing out of my mouth. "You know what? I think I know why. I've had _a lot _of time _alone _to figure it out," I spat bitterly. Alice flinched, and Edward's body stiffened.

"It's because I'm nothing worth sticking around for. A weak, clumsy, stupid human! I'm a huge burden to all of you and you just couldn't stand it anymore. I don't blame you though," I laughed without humor. "I'm not worth it. I'm not worth your time. I never was." My body moved of its own accord and I was facing a shocked Edward, looking him directly in the eyes.

"Why did you save me from Tyler's van? From James?" The words fell out of my mouth in a whisper.

Edward's eyes grew big, and I couldn't exactly place the emotions that were flashing across his face. Jasper winced and I could tell he was getting hit by the force of all of our emotions. _There you go again, Bella. Causing them even more trouble than they need, _I thought. I suddenly felt exhausted, the rapid rush of my rant gone from my body. I needed to go lie down somewhere.

Abruptly, I turned on my heel and made my way to the cafeteria exit, ignoring the curious stares of the other students. I needed to be alone.

* * *

A/N: Well, that was actually shorter than I thought it would be. Don't worry, though, the next chapter is on its way! I'm also thinking that Edward POV will probably be a once in a while thing. Mainly, this is because I'm not too sure if I can get Edward's character right, but also I really want the story to be from Bella's eyes.

Please review, it keeps me going!


	3. Chapter 3

Alright, guys. You are all amazing and make me super excited about posting this story! *tears up* I love you all!

So I realized (after getting a very helpful review from Icantbelieveiamdoingthis...thanks hun!) that I totally forgot to give a little backstory about before the Cullens came back! Ha, silly me. Anyways, the deal is that when Edward left, Bella really was on her own. She didn't develop the same relationship with Jacob as she did in New Moon. He only called her every once in a while like good friends do, but she never really went to La Push to hang out with him. Therefore, she did not find out that Jacob is a werewolf. However, I have a plan for Jacob later on, so if you guys are patient enough, you will definitely see him!

Okay, enough of my babbling. On to the story!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Really. I don't own it. At all.**

**

* * *

**

**Bella POV:**

"Bella, please, call me back." _Message deleted._

_New message. _"Okay, Bella. I know you probably don't want to talk, but I think it's really important that we do." _Message deleted._

_New message. _"Please? At least talk to _me_." _Message deleted._

I sighed. Alice had left my phone 17 messages. I knew she felt bad and wanted to talk, but I didn't want to have another outburst. I wanted to be sure that I could keep control of my mouth before I talked to them again. So, even though it pained me, I shut off my cell phone before Alice could make another call.

I pushed myself off of my bed where I had been doing homework. It was getting late and Charlie would be home soon, so I headed downstairs to begin dinner. I decided to make homemade macaroni and cheese. It would take longer and would therefore give me something to concentrate on instead of being left alone with my dangerous thoughts.

As I started to boil a pot of water, however, my mind began to drift. I thought back to the beginning of school, when I had fallen. Edward had caught me and there was what seemed to be concern in his eyes. _Concern? _I scoffed mentally. _Why would he care about me? _I used to be an insignificant part of his life, one that he was happy to discard. It was like him and his family were a beautiful, lush bouquet of roses, and I was the small, wilting and pale bud in the back of the bunch. Unattractive and weak, I took the beauty away from the entire presentation. It was only right that he left, because I was nothing special or extraordinary. I couldn't belong with them.

* * *

"So how was your day, Bells?"

I looked up from my meal. Charlie was already serving himself seconds, not really paying attention to me. I winced a little, and went back to picking at my food. "It was alright," I said quietly.

"So..." he trailed off. Charlie sounded uncomfortable.

"What is it, Dad?" I asked.

"Um, well, I don't know how you're gonna take this, kid. But, uh, the Cullens are back, and well...they invited you to stay the weekend."

"What?" I nearly dropped my fork. So they went to Charlie when they couldn't go through me. What nerve. "Well, what did you say?"

"Um, I said yes?" Charlie turned the words into a question. I frowned. "But you gotta understand, Bella. I thought maybe...well, maybe it would help you."

I looked Charlie straight in the eyes. He looked very sad and kind of ashamed. He was ashamed of trying to help his pathetic daughter.

"I just think you should talk to them, Bells. Maybe sort things out," he continued nervously. I sighed.

"If you really want me to, I will," I said. Charlie visibly relaxed. He smiled hopefully at me.

"Thanks, Bella. I know it's hard, but I just...need something to help you, that's all." His smile disappeared as his brow furrowed. He cleared his throat and stood from his spot. "You can take a break tonight, Bells. I'll do the dishes."

I gave a small smile. Charlie really didn't know what to do with me. I'd tried to be normal, I really did. But I think that deep down, I knew, and Charlie knew, that it was too hard to pretend everyday that my heart was whole and happy. After all, he'd probably experienced it when Renee left him. I knew that I had to try, at least for Charlie.

Later that night, I sat on my bed, staring at the ceiling. A gentle rain was falling outside and I kept my curtains pulled open so I could watch the raindrops collect on my window.

Tomorrow was Friday, which meant that after school I would be staying at the Cullens' for the weekend. I honestly didn't know if I would make it through. The reason why I didn't want to stay was because I knew how much trouble it would be on everyone. Sure, Alice might want me to come, but what about the others? I'd only be disrupting their sanctuary. And yet, I desperately wanted to see them. It would be painful, but I decided before falling asleep from the lull of the rainfall that I would go see them. I would put up my walls so I would be protected, and I would make it through the weekend without (hopefully) causing the Cullens any trouble.

* * *

The drive to school was quiet and melancholy. I had to struggle to keep the truck from splashing into huge puddles of murky water left over from last night's downpour. I pulled into a parking space at the far end of the parking lot. As I hopped out, I saw them again, waiting in a large clump by the Volvo. I took a deep breath. This was the time to start putting up the walls, the barriers around my heart. I hardened my expression, and without any further thought, I made my way towards them.

As I got closer, Alice's smile grew bigger. But when she caught sight of my expression, it flickered. I stopped short from them, a few feet away.

"Hello, Alice. Jasper. Rosalie. Emmett. Ed...Edward." I stumbled on his name, flinching when he turned his full gaze on me.

"Hi Bella! What time do you think you'll be coming over?" Alice asked. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Um, I don't know. When is it okay for me to come?" I said.

"Well, you know that you are always welcome, anytime." Alice smiled. "But to make it easier, let's say 5:30?"

"Okay," I nodded. An uncomfortable silence began as all of them stared at me. I played with the sleeves of my jacket. "So...how are Carlisle and Esme?"

"Oh, they are just fine. They've been wanting to see you too, you know."

"That's good," I mumbled. "Well, I'll see you tonight, then."

"Of course," Alice said. I huffed and started to turn and head off to class. I was only five feet away from them when I heard my name being called. I turned around to face them.

"Bella, I just want you to know that you can come talk to me anytime," Alice said. I nodded stiffly. Turning back around, I speed-walked to the school doors like the coward that I was.

My classes passed by in a blur, and too soon it was time for lunch. I stood in line with a bottle of juice clenched in my hands. As I was paying for it, I saw the Cullens enter the cafeteria out of the corner of my eye. They walked to their table and sat, and as soon as Alice saw me she began waving me over. I decided that I would go sit with them; I needed to practice my composure before heading over to their place tonight.

I took the open seat next to Alice. She smiled gratefully, and I scooted my chair closer to her when I noticed that Edward was on my other side. His expression faltered for a second before becoming neutral and indifferent once more.

Throughout the whole lunch period, I sat listening to Alice's recount of the family's travels since their absence. I only listened halfheartedly, playing with the juice bottle in my hands. Every now and then, I would sneak a glance at Edward. He still stared at me with that calm face, and I couldn't help but feel depressed. Clearly, his leaving didn't have the same effect on him as it had on me. He seemed like he did perfectly fine without me, and it hurt me deeply. I stared sadly at the tabletop, my eyes starting to tear up. Jasper broke through Alice's rambling.

"Are you okay, Bella?" he asked, concerned. He could probably feel my sudden mood change.

"Yeah. I'm fine," I replied. I looked up at him, and his eyes were sad and almost knowing. Alice looked at me intently. I shook my head and breathed deeply.

"Really, I'm good," I said more firmly. Jasper nodded and looked away. Alice patted my arm reassuringly. I noticed Edward stiffened infinitesimally. He stood from his chair quietly, as did the others. Lunch was just about over and the other students were clearing out. I followed the Cullens out, anxious to get to the end of the day.

* * *

4:30pm. I was to be over at the Cullens' in an hour. I packed a bag of clothes and other necessities. I was now working on several meals that would become Charlie's dinner for the next couple of nights. I knew he was completely hopeless in the kitchen, and I shuddered to think about what I would return to find if I left him to fend for himself.

As I packed the meals into little tupperware containers, I could see the approach of the evening out of the kitchen window. The sky was a blend of orange and yellow, and the dark night rested slightly about the bright colors. It was almost twilight, I noted. The time where the Cullens were safe. The time where they could be free from hiding. It was almost fitting that I would be coming over around this time, there to ruin their peace.

I grabbed my heavy bag and locked the front door behind me. I might as well start heading over there while the light of the sun was still out. I tripped on the last step of the porch (as always) and made my way to my truck. I threw my back in the back and climbed in. Starting with a loud roar, I let the truck idle for a moment. I'd been having this internal battle all day, and now it was time to live up to my decision. I pulled off of my street quickly before I could change my mind and run back inside the house.

* * *

A/N: So what will happen at the Cullens' house? Only I know.....review to find out!


	4. Chapter 4

So here is the first chapter of the weekend at the Cullens' house! Here's the deal: because of your guys' awesome response and because there is so much going on at this moment in the story, I'm putting up two chapters today. That's right, **TWO **chapters! It's my special treat for you guys who are so amazing awesome!!! And also, I was originally gonna put everything in one chapter, which ended up being a bad idea. So here you go guys!!!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: I think we all know by now who owns this fantastic series.**

* * *

**Bella POV:**

Finding the Cullens' was a bit more difficult than I remembered; after all, I avoided the place like the plague. Eventually I found the little hidden path that would take me up the road to the timeless house. I pulled up right in front, close enough to where I could probably see inside the large windows. I turned the truck off and sat for a few minutes, collection myself. I worked once again to put on a blank expression and, grabbing my bag, marched up to the front door. I rang the doorbell once, and not five seconds later the door flew open.

"Hi Bella!" Alice shouted. She leaped forward and grabbed my free hand, dragging me inside. "I'm so glad you came. We're going to have so much fun, so relax and take it easy!"

I managed a weak smile. Alice grinned back at me and led me into the large living room. There on the plush sofas sat Carlisle and Esme, waiting patiently. Esme was leaning her beautiful head on Carlisle's shoulder, and when I came in she stood immediately.

"Bella! It's so good to see you!" Esme exclaimed. Carlisle stood to join her.

"We've missed you, Bella," Carlisle said with a smile.

"I've missed you, too. Thanks for letting me spend the weekend," I said shyly.

"Oh of course, you are certainly welcome anytime." Esme stepped forward. "Did you already have dinner?"

"Um, no," I said. "But you don't have to do that for me, really."

"Oh nonsense! I'm happy to put the kitchen to use," Esme winked. "You can go and play with Alice and I'll call you when everything is ready." She started to walk out of the room. Carlisle laughed.

"Really, Bella. Esme loves taking care of you. She, as well as I, sees you as one of our daughters."

I couldn't believe the amount of love I felt in that moment. Carlisle and Esme would always be my second set of parents, and it filled me with happiness to know they felt the same.

"Thank you," I said, my voice wavering. So much for my walls. Alice tugged at my arm then.

"Come on! Upstairs to my room!" She had a wicked glint in her eye. I suddenly got nervous.

"Um, Alice? What exactly are we doing?"

She smiled nice and big. "Your hair is practically begging for a new style."

I gasped and turned to run, but she already had a good grip on me and pulled me faster towards her room. I yelled the whole way, trying to get her to stop, but before I knew it I was sitting in a chair in her room, Alice's hands working furiously with a curling iron wrapped in my hair.

"Bella, if I ask you something, will you answer me honestly?" Alice said thoughtfully.

"I guess," I replied.

"Okay. Well, how were you doing while we were...gone?"

I froze. Alice noticed this and put down the curling iron. She stepped back to look at me more closely. I sighed.

"I did...the best I could, Alice," I said slowly. I was starting to panic a little. "I tried to be normal for everyone. I really did. But," I took in a shaky breath, "I couldn't stand the pain. Everyday I felt myself grow weaker and weaker. I couldn't sleep or eat. Most times it felt like I couldn't breathe."

Alice's eyes grew saddened. She was about to say something when I cut her off; I had lost control of my mouth again. "I had no one, Alice. No one. Nobody talked to me, nobody cared. Charlie just didn't know what to do with me. I was practically catatonic, and when I did feel, all it was, all the time, was a burning pain. Alice, I-" a sob interrupted my words. "I wanted...to die," I whispered. Tears blurred my vision as I looked down at my lap. I felt cold arms wrap around me, and I turned so I could sob into Alice's shirt. I cried as Alice rubbed my back soothingly. My tears soon died down until I was left hugging Alice silently.

"Dinner's ready, if you'd like some," she said gently. I nodded and stood slowly. She smiled encouragingly at me. I went down the stairs and into the kitchen, where Esme was setting out silverware for me. She must have heard the entire exchange between Alice and I, because she looked up and smiled sadly at me. I forced a smile back and took my seat, where a huge pile of food sat. Alice took a seat across from me, and we began to talk about trivial, lighter topics as I ate. I began to finally relax. Maybe the rest of tonight wouldn't be so bad.

**

* * *

**

**Edward POV:**

"I wanted...to die," I'd heard her whisper, and the CD case I was holding in my hands snapped in half. I was in my room, hiding like a coward. When I heard that Bella was going to spend the weekend, I didn't know what to do. I so desperately wanted to see her, but I had no idea if she wanted to see me, not after what I had done to her. So I locked myself up in my room and resorted to listening to their conversations. When Bella told Alice that she longed for death, it devastated me. I had done this to her. I had taken away her will to live. Her sobs tore through me, and I had to fight myself not break into Alice's room and take her into my arms.

I could hear Esme's thoughts from downstairs as Bella cried. _The poor girl, _she thought. _I'm glad we came back when we did, or else who knows what would have happened. _I felt mortified as I realized the enormity of Esme's words. What if we hadn't come back when we did? Would Bella still be alive? I shuddered.

"Dinner's ready, if you'd like some," Alice said. Her thoughts were erratic, starting and stopping constantly. _I will kill Edward. Look at what he's done! _Good. I wanted her to be angry with me, I deserved it. _Oh, Bella. I'm sorry, I wish things could get better, _Alice thought. They were now heading downstairs to the kitchen.

Through Alice's mind I saw them sit at the table and talk while Bella ate. Bella was certainly very thin and weak, and her eyes had dark bags under them. It pained me to look at her fragile state, and at the same time I couldn't stop looking.

I sighed and went to sit on my black couch. I couldn't stand not knowing what Bella thought of me. I didn't care if she was angry with me; I just wanted to know. Her mental blockade aggravated me more in this moment than ever before.

I heard the large strides of people running outside. Rosalie and Emmett must be back from...well, whatever they were doing in the forest. I could hear the back door open and close, and a second later the television came on, probably by Emmett. I stood to try to find a new CD when I heard Rosalie's words, clear as day.

"What's wrong with you?"

**

* * *

**

**Bella POV:**

I snapped my head up from my plate. Rosalie stood there, her eyebrows raised and her arms crossed.

"What?" I whispered. She huffed.

"I said, what's wrong with you? Your mood has gotten everyone down since we moved back."

"Rose," Alice warned. Rosalie looked over at her.

"What? I'm just trying to know what everyone is afraid of asking. It's not my fault that she continues to prove how weak she is," said Rosalie. I looked down at the tabletop. Rosalie was absolutely right, and for that I liked her even more. She definitely wasn't afraid to be blunt.

"Rosalie!" Alice exclaimed angrily. From somewhere else in the house, I heard a growl, low and deep. I cleared my throat.

"No, Alice, it's okay. She's just speaking the truth," I said quietly. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"Look, I'm just saying that, well, we're back now, so cheer up! Now, when we moved I understood that it was to protect you and everything, but I saw it as mostly a way to protect us. I would not allow you to ruin our family's cover. You should be happy that we made this sacrifice for you," Rosalie's words were spinning in my head. They left to protect me? How is that possible?

"Rosalie, I think you should go now," Alice growled. Rosalie shrugged.

"But, Bella, you never answered my question. What's your problem? Is it self-esteem issues or what? I know Edward left you, but you had to have known that he would have left eventually." Another louder growl echoed through the house.

My vision became cloudy again. The corners of my eyes began to sting as Alice walked up and pushed Rosalie out of the kitchen. I blinked repeatedly to force the tears away. Rosalie was right; Edward would have left me eventually. I sighed heavily and started to clean up my plate. Esme appeared instantly and took the plate from my hands. "I'll take care of it," she said kindly. I nodded and Alice led me back to her room, where we made small talk and Alice finished the rest of my hair.

* * *

A/N: Yeah, that was a weird place to stop the chapter. But don't worry, stay tuned for more later on today!!


	5. Chapter 5

As promised, here is the next chapter! I think it's the longest so far, so enjoy it!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Why would I be writing fanfiction if I owned Twilight? Just saying.**

* * *

**Bella POV:**

"Now, you can sleep here, and I'll see you in the morning," Alice tossed me a pillow. She was letting me sleep in her room tonight. "Thanks, Alice," I said. She smiled and slipped out the door, shutting it quietly behind her. I slid under the covers of her plush bed, anxious to get to sleep. However, the buzzing of my cell phone prevented me from even shutting my eyes. I answered it lazily.

"Hello?" I greeted.

"Bella? Is everything alright?" a panicked, young voice responded. I was confused.

"Jacob? Why are you calling so late?" I hadn't spoken to Jacob in a while, but his familiar voice was a sort of comfort to me.

"Well, I called over at your house, and your dad picked up and said you weren't home, that you were at..."

"At?"

"At the _Cullens_'," he spat, his voice filled with an angry tone.

"Yes, they invited me to spend the weekend," I explained.

"I didn't even know they came back," Jacob said, sounding disgusted. I had always known that everyone up at La Push had some animosity toward the Cullens, but I never really knew Jacob to be the type that agreed with that animosity.

"Until a few days ago, neither did I," I said lightly. Jacob sighed.

"Bells, you know that you can always count on me for anything, right?"

"Yeah, but Jake, what's wrong?" I asked, trying to find the source of his sour mood.

"Just promise me that you'll call me if anything bad happens or if you need anything, okay?" he said tersely, avoiding my question.

"Alright, I promise," I replied, still confused.

"Good. Bye, Bella." And with that, he hung up.

I put my phone back in its spot on the bedside table. What was wrong with Jake? He was so panicked, I didn't understand it. I'd have to talk to him once I got back home.

I rested my head on the pillow. I couldn't guarantee that I would get any sleep, though. I shut my eyes to the sound of the TV on downstairs.

_I was swimming, far out in the distant ocean. My body was tired, and I couldn't swim anymore. The sky was dark and stormy with occasional streaks of lightning dancing across. I felt the danger, the need to get out of the water, but my body wouldn't listen to my mental commands. Across the way, I could see what almost appeared to be a flame on the water. It was fire red, and it was speeding quickly towards me. A slow fear was rising in me, but I was too exhausted to move. Just as I started to sink under the surface, a pair of cold arms wrapped around my waist. I screamed, a slow and foreign sound to me. A velvety voice cut through the sound._

_"Bella." It was Edward; I could feel his hard body against my back. He was holding me in an embrace as we floated in the water. I turned so I could look at him and gasped at what I saw._

_Edward's eyes were pitch black. His expression was one of pure anger and hatred. I could feel my eyes grow big as he started to loosen his grip on me. "I told you that I don't want you anymore," he said in a hard voice. "Why can't you understand that?"_

_He started to let go of my waist. I turned my head and I could see that the red flame was closer than before. Edward started to push me closer to the direction of the flame. "What are you doing?" I asked in a weak voice._

_"You are a nuisance, Bella. I'm tired of you," he replied simply. Only his hands were touching me now._

_The flame was yards away. "No, Edward!" I cried._

_"Leave me alone, Bella." And with that, he let me go. I fought to stay afloat. But as my head bobbed in the water one last time, I saw the flame in its entirety, a pair of fierce crimson eyes..._

Cold hands were shaking me awake. "Bella! Bella, wake up!" I realized I was still screaming, and I shut my mouth, only slightly muffling the sound. I opened my eyes, wet with tears, slowly.

Edward was the one shaking me. His eyes were concerned, his touch gentle. Alice was standing a few feet away with a worried look on her face. I looked back at Edward and rolled away from his grasp. His face fell.

"I'm alright," I said breathlessly. That nightmare just felt so real to me. Edward pushed me toward danger instead of protecting me from it. I was a burden for him, he even said so.

"You had a nightmare. It must have been really powerful," Edward said. I pulled the covers back over my body.

"Yeah, well, you get used to them after a while," I mumbled. His breath faltered.

"How long have you been having nightmares, Bella" he asked.

_Since you left, _I wanted to say. Instead, I rolled over so I didn't have to see his face.

"Alright, well, I think I'll go now," Alice said quickly. I heard the door open, then close.

"Bella? How long?" Edward pressed.

I sighed. "Why do you care?" The bed sank in a little from his weight as he sat down.

"Bella, of course I would care. I know that I did possibly irreversible damage. I want you to know that...I'm sorry. Terribly sorry, Bella."

Oh no. I couldn't have this conversation now. I wasn't ready for it; ready for his apology for ruining my life and then his announcement that he would be leaving again. I grew silent and tried to fall back asleep. I needed to think before we got into this discussion.

"Bella?" he asked anxiously.

"Tomorrow, please," I mumbled into the pillow. I heard him stand.

"Alright, then," he said. "Goodnight, Bella."

I waited a few seconds before turning back over. When I did, he was gone, and I was left to fight the battle for sleep alone.

* * *

In the end, I only got about 3 hours of sleep. The rest of the time was spent staring at the canopy of Alice's bed. The sun rose, breaking into the room and throwing a yellow glow from the window. I knew that today, I would be talking to Edward. We would determine where we stood, although I thought we already knew. He didn't want me, and I was hopelessly in love with him.

After my morning routine, I stood, tired and anxious, in front of Alice's door. I debated just staying in and hiding under the covers for the rest of the day. Why was I such a coward about this? Why couldn't I be strong for once? _Because he'll hurt you, _a voice inside my head said truthfully. _You're afraid to get hurt again. _I tried to think of defenses, some way to protect myself from the pain. Defeated, I slowly opened the door and headed down the stairs.

In the kitchen, Esme was waiting with an enormous breakfast spread. I smiled gratefully, taking a plate and loading it with food. Alice came bounding in, followed by a very sullen Edward. She sat beside me, taking in my appearance.

"Did you get any sleep at all?" she asked.

"Yes," I replied. I stared down at my piece of French toast I was working on to avoid looking in her eyes. She sighed.

"You look really tired, Bella."

I said nothing. I twirled my fork around the plate, drawing imaginary patterns. The sound of a throat clearing made me look up. Edward paused, unsure, but then the words came out.

"Would you like to take a walk with me, Bella?"

My hand strained over the fork, squeezing it until my knuckles were white. So he was going to leave again, complete with a repeat performance of last time. Edward noticed my reaction.

"Bella, what's wrong?" He looked confused. "What? Did I say someth...oh." A look of comprehension dawned on him. I guess he realized the familiarity of his words. I closed my eyes and exhaled, not realizing that I had been holding my breath the entire time.

"I'm sorry, I...didn't mean it like last time. Really, Bella. You can lead the way if you'd like," Edward backtracked. I opened my eyes and saw that Alice had her back turned, probably trying to give us "privacy."

"Okay," I decided. I pushed my plate away from me. "Let me just grab a coat and some shoes."

Edward smiled, a genuinely happy smile. "I'll meet you at the door."

* * *

The path we walked down was worn and barren. The sun was partially hidden by a few clouds, but other than that it was pretty bright. The greenery around us was wet, glistening as sunlight hit the branches of the trees. Having pulled the hood of my jacket over my head, I stuffed my hands in my pockets. I walked a few feet ahead of Edward, although he was so silent I was never sure he was really there. Suddenly, he was at my side, keeping pace with my steps.

"Bella, I just...I need you to hear this. I know it all will probably never be enough, but I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for causing you so much pain, sorry for hurting you, sorry for not being there for you," he said sincerely. I stared straight ahead.

"You don't have to do this, Edward," I stated. My voice was tired and agonized. "Don't feel like you have to apologize for something beyond your control."

"I don't understand," he replied, truly perplexed. I sighed.

"You left because you grew tired of me. It's not your fault. You had every right to leave. Heck, you still do," I explained. He was silent, and then he spoke, an angry, intense sound in his voice.

"You think I left because I didn't want you anymore?" he nearly growled.

"Um, pretty much. It's very reasonable, actually."

Edward groaned, a strangled sound in his throat. He stopped walking, and I turned to face him. "What?" I asked.

"Bella, I left because me and my family were a huge danger to you. After your birthday party, I realized that you deserved better. You deserve someone who didn't endanger your every move. I'd hoped that you would have moved on, found someone else. But I was weak. I came back for you, because I couldn't stand it anymore. I care about you too much, Bella. I love you."

I was frozen, my eyes wide. He still loved me? I shook my head, extremely confused. If that were true, then why did all my logic and reasoning make sense? I wasn't worth his time or effort, I thought I saw that just as clearly as he did.

"How?" I whispered. I balled my pocketed hands into fists to stop them from shaking. Edward's eyes tightened.

"How? Bella, I've always loved you. I've never stopped. It was seeing your face in my mind every moment that brought me back here," he said, as if he were a parent scolding a child.

"That's not possible," I said quietly. He growled.

"What have I done? Why me? Oh Bella..." He was talking more to himself now. He looked upward and was about to speak again, but the sound of his phone interrupted him. He reached into his pocket and flipped his phone open.

"What, Alice?" he yelled. A short pause followed, and then he was speaking rapidly, too quickly for a human to comprehend. He shut his phone and turned back to me, his face hard.

"We have to go," he said, and reached for my arm. Before I could understand what was happening, I was on his back, and we were racing through the trees back to the Cullen mansion. He didn't stop until we had blown through the front door and halted in the center of the living room. He helped me climb stiffly off his back. The entire family had gathered in the living room waiting for our arrival. Carlisle stood, his face grim.

"I'm so sorry to cut your time short, Bella. But an urgent matter has come up," he said.

"Why? What's going on?" I asked. Carlisle shared a weary look with Edward before continuing.

"It's Victoria, Bella. She's back and she's looking for you."

* * *

A/N: Dun dun DUHN!!! Ha, that was too fun. Bring on the reviews!


	6. Chapter 6

I actually don't have much to say this time, ha. Here's the next chapter; it's a little shorter than usual so sorry about that!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: I. Don't. Own. Twilight.**

* * *

**Bella POV:**

The sound of the Volvo trunk echoed in the spacious garage. Everyone was moving furiously, packing clothes and supplies for the next few days. I was standing, still in shock. Victoria. I'd nearly forgotten all about her. She was still out there, terrorizing and killing. Why was she after me? Why couldn't I ever have a moment of peace in my life?

Edward and Alice approached me then. Alice handed me a bag of clothes and my cell phone.

"I called Charlie and told him that we're going on a camping trip for a few days and we invited you to come. He said that was fine and he excused you from school. He was relieved and said that you could do whatever you needed to 'make things better with the Cullens.' He should be safe," she explained quickly. I nodded numbly. Alice turned and went to help Jasper load their things. Edward stepped closer to me.

"I promise, Bella. I promise I will keep you safe. She can't hurt you," he reassured me. I looked up into his topaz eyes, taken aback by the intensity there. I couldn't speak or breathe, only stare back, lost in his gaze.

"Bella?" he asked, eyes growing concerned. I blinked and took in a large gulp of air, my heart racing. A blush, something I hadn't felt in a long time, creeped over my cheeks. I hated that he could do this to me; render me speechless with one look.

"Yeah, um...so what's the plan, then?" I asked. He stared past me as he spoke.

"Rosalie and Esme are going to stay around this area, mostly to watch over the people and Charlie. The rest of us are all going to go into hiding for a little bit, draw Victoria away from other people. Then, when we've got her close enough, we'll ambush her."

"But Edward, are you sure it will work?" I asked worriedly. I didn't want anyone hurt on my account.

"Of course. According to Alice's visions, we'll be fine. But if anything should change, we'll know right away and we can adjust accordingly," Edward said calmly.

"But what if something happens? I'll never forgive myself..." I trailed off, seeing the pointed look in his eyes. I felt a sudden sense of deja vu as I realized that this entire situation had occurred before, only with James. _How strange, _I thought.

"We. Will. Be. Fine. Now, let's get going, and after this whole mess is over, we can finally _talk_." He stressed the last word. I nodded. We still had many things to discuss about us.

Both Edward and I slid into the Volvo. Alice and Jasper followed, getting into the backseat. I looked out the window and saw Esme and Rosalie wishing Carlisle and Emmett goodbye. Carlisle quickly left in his Mercedes, while Emmett took his time with Rosalie. After a few moments, Alice reached forward and honked the horn, bringing them both back to reality. Emmett grinned sheepishly and hopped in his Jeep, bounding away with a roar. Edward started the car and peeled quickly out of the garage. As Alice and Jasper talked in the back, Edward stared forward at the road, accelerating gradually. I picked at my sleeves, restless. I felt a wave of calm come over me, and I looked over into the rear view mirror at Jasper. 'Thank you,' I mouthed, and he smiled in return. I placed my forearm on the armrest in the middle, trying to keep the calm.

I was staring mindlessly at the blurred images outside when I felt a cold hand envelope my own. I looked over at Edward, a little surprised. He kept his eyes on the road, but his thumb rubbed small circles into the back of my hand. I looked away, secretly thrilled that he touched me. I thought I heard Alice squeal with joy, followed by a quiet chuckle from Jasper. But I couldn't allow myself to fully enjoy it, though; I still didn't know if Edward and I were alright, and I wasn't taking any chances.

I settled deeper into my seat. It was really relaxing in the calm of the car. I was just about to speak when all of a sudden, a large brown blur flew across the windshield. I cried out as a loud smack came from the windshield. Edward stomped on the brake, causing the car to skid to the other side of the road. I was held back by my seatbelt as the force of the car brought everything to a halt.

"What was that?" I asked breathlessly. Edward was furiously unbuckling his seatbelt, and a second later he was out of the car. I clumsily followed after him.

Alice and Jasper were already out of the car as well, pacing in circles around the area. Edward was still, his eyes darting back and forth constantly. I looked around my self, trying to find the source of everyone's apprehension.

"Get back in the car, Bella," Edward ordered.

"What is it?" I pressed. He sighed.

"Bella, please, get back in the car."

I tried to protest again when Edward quickly jumped in front of me into a protective stance. He growled loudly, his body shaking from the force of it. I followed the direction of his gaze and gasped.

A large, reddish-brown animal was there, a rumbling coming from its chest. It looked to be a wolf, almost the size of an adult bear. Its eyes flew straight to me, growing narrower. The wolf looked back at Edward, opening his mouth and showing off his rows of teeth. Edward growled even lower, and turned his head to the side, seeming to communicate with the wolf.

The wolf looked back at me and whimpered, a sad sound. Turning its large body away from our group, the wolf darted away in the opposite direction.

Edward slowly stood from his protective crouch, and grabbed my arm to guide me to the car. Once we were all inside, I spoke again.

"That thing was huge! It looked like some sort of wolf or something," I said. Edward didn't reply, focusing back on the road. "What was it?" I asked, trying to get a response. He still didn't say anything.

"Edward? Say something. It looked like you were somehow able to communicate with it," I urged. His hands tightened around the steering wheel.

"It was a werewolf, Bella."

I sat there dumbfounded. A werewolf? In Forks? Okay, vampires were enough of a stretch, but werewolves? It was like I was walking around in some sci-fi movie. "Huh." I leaned back in the seat, trying to process the appearance of this new mythical creature. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised," I said blankly.

"Don't worry, Bella. They won't hurt you, not as long as I'm around," Edward said stiffly. I didn't reply, instead staring back out of the windows. This was just too unreal.

* * *

The sun was setting as Jasper and Edward finished putting up the tent. We had driven far into the wilderness, careful to leave the windows open so my scent could create a trail for Victoria to follow. Emmett was doing a quick jog around the area, running slightly less than vampire speed. I was standing with Carlisle and Alice, looking on as the night started its approach. Alice took a deep breath and grew still; she must be searching the future. Edward finished and walked over to us. Alice was silent for a few moments, and then suddenly she came back to life.

"We should be fine for tonight," she said. Carlisle nodded.

"It looks like we're safe for now," Emmett said, running up to our group. Jasper walked up soon after.

"Well, then, I guess we're set. Let's get to our respective location to keep watch. Bella, I do recommend that you get some rest. I'm sure this whole situation has been very draining," Carlisle said.

"Right," I said, and I turned to go into the massive tent. It was so large that I was able to step in without ducking my head, and the interior of the tent was sectioned off into separate rooms. I decided to sleep in the room in the farthest part of the tent. I rolled my sleeping bag out and slipped under, hoping to get at least a little sleep.

* * *

A/N: Mysterious creature in the woods? More like a certain Quileute-turned-werewolf. Anyways, reviews are great!


	7. Chapter 7

This chapter is pretty special....you'll see why! We're almost to the end, and I've had so much fun sharing this with you guys. Thanks for adding this story to your favorites and story alerts!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Um...I own a paperback copy of Twilight, but that's about it.**

* * *

**Bella POV:**

I tried uselessly to fall asleep, but the whole excitement of the situation just kept me up. The entire tent was dark know. As I rolled over, I heard approaching footsteps, careful and quiet, though not quite hidden from the noisy material of the tent.

"Bella? Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I can't." It suddenly got bright as a flashlight came on, Edward holding it.

"Why not?" he asked, taking a seat a few feet away from me.

"Well, considering the circumstances, it's kind of hard for me to relax," I said, turning to face him.

"Would you..." I looked as he hesitated. "Would you like me to sing you to sleep?"

The idea was tempting, but we still needed to talk before this went any further. "Um, how about we talk first?"

He sighed. "Bella, I don't think now is a good time. Maybe when everything is done and over..." he trailed off.

"But Edward, we desperately need to! If we don't I'm not sure if I..." I couldn't finish my thought aloud.

"You what?" Edward said gently. I took in a deep breath.

"I'm not sure if I can handle it when you leave again."

Edward's eyes were wide and he grew very still. Then, slowly and deliberately, he spoke.

"I will never leave you again, Bella."

"But you have reason to. You heard Rosalie back at the house. She's right; I'm weak and pathetic. Nothing about me is even remotely attractive. I'm always having to be saved and I'm a burden to you and your family. Look at the mess we're in right now!"

Everything was silent, then. I knew the others were listening in on our conversation. Edward instantly moved closer, staring into my eyes furiously. His hands twitched.

"Don't listen to what Rosalie says! How could you ever believe that about yourself?" he said fiercely.

"It's true!" I exclaimed, suppressed anger flaring up inside me. Why couldn't he see my point?

"No, it's not! Bella, you are a beautiful person inside and out. I love everything about you, even the fact that you can barely walk across a flat surface without tripping! I just want to be the one to be there to catch you. As I said before, I left to protect you. I can see now that it did more harm than good," Edward said defeated. "If you don't want to be with me, I understand."

My eyes started to tear over. "Edward, can't you see? I've missed you so much. Of course I still want you!" I was sobbing at this point, deep heaving breaths shaking my whole body. Edward's face was agonized. He hesitated for a second, and then I was in his arms, pressed tightly against his chest. I continued crying as I spoke again.

"Edward...I already told you...that I...I don't care," I said, breathing sharply. "I don't care what you are. I love you and will always love you, no matter what." I swallowed. "I just feel like I'm not enough for you."

"You're more than enough," he said, his hand rubbing my back. I had stopped the full-out sobs, but tears were still leaking from my eyes. My breathing was loud and hysterical. Edward was shushing me, still holding me and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over again. My hand was clenched in his jacket, gripping for my life. I looked up at him and he reached up to brush the wetness away from my cheek. His eyes were apologetic and full of love, something I wasn't expecting. His cold hand moved to tilt my face up toward his. I closed my eyes, the anticipation making my body tremble. I breathed in his sweet scent as his lips touched mine.

I had missed this. The way Edward could drive me crazy with such a simple act. His kiss was tender, but firm, and our lips danced gently together. My hands moved to tangle themselves into his bronze mess of hair. I pulled myself closer to him, and he wrapped his arms tighter around me. I was running out of air, but I didn't care. I poured all the love I had for him into the kiss, crushing my lips to his. He was just as eager, his hands sliding up and down my back, feeling as much of me as he could. I shuddered with pleasure as I felt his tongue slide along the line of my lips. I opened my mouth, only to gasp for air. As I tried to fill my lungs with oxygen, Edward trailed soft kisses down my jawline. His head came to rest in the crook of my shoulder.

"I love you, Bella Swan. More than anything in the world," he murmured, pressing his nose to my neck and breathing in deeply. I was ecstatic. He loved me back. All of the self-loathing and worthlessness was pushed to the back of my mind. Not completely forgotten, though. Instead I focused on the here and now, able to finally put down my walls.

Edward moved us down to the ground. I pulled my sleeping bag up over my body and Edward put me flush against him. I nuzzled further into his chest, finally content. The top of this emotionally draining evening came when, just as I was on the brink of unconsciousness, Edward began to hum my lullaby. I must have looked stupid with the silly grin that appeared on my face, but it didn't matter. After all this time, I was finally in his arms.

* * *

I woke up the next morning, reveling in the feel of Edward against me. I kept my eyes shut, but like always he knew better. I felt him press a kiss to the top of my head.

"Bella, love. I know you're awake," he said quietly. I turned my head up and opened my eyes.

"Good morning," I said sleepily. I really didn't want to get up, just laying here with him for a while would be fine by me.

"Good morning," he greeted. His arms wound around my waist. "I'm surprised. You didn't say a word in your sleep."

"I haven't had a good night's sleep since, well..." I stopped talking as his face fell.

"I'll never forgive myself," he said, pained. I started to sit up.

"No more of that. It's done for now," I said firmly. I tried stand up, only to remember that I was still in my sleeping bag. I fell over, but Edward quickly caught me and steadied me on my feet. I turned to leave the tent, Edward trailing behind.

The sun was unable to break through the clouds, creating a gloomy grey. It was slightly windy, and the cold air helped add to the feeling that something big was coming. I breathed in deeply, the smell of rain and the forest filling my senses.

"Oh good, you're awake!" Alice exclaimed from behind me. I turned around, smiling as Alice danced up to me. She had a knowing grin plastered on her face. She took my hand and pulled me away, leaving Edward behind.

We walked off a little ways so I could fully stretch out. Alice could barely wait to speak until we were far enough away that the others couldn't hear us.

"So, you and Edward finally sorted it out," she said.

"Yup."

"Yup? That's all you're going to say?" Bella, I'm not deaf. We all heard you two last night," Alice scoffed. I blushed, not responding.

"Look, it may be none of my business but, Bella. Really. He loves you for who you are. The only reason why we left was because his own stupid reasons. It wasn't because he stopped loving you. It was quite the opposite, actually."

I nodded. "I guess it'll take some time."

"Don't worry. He's more than willing to wait," Alice replied. I smiled at her.

"I hope so," I said. Alice rolled her eyes.

"Trust me, Bella. _I would know_."

I laughed, and Alice started to steer us back to the tent. We had wandered out a little far, but I knew that we wouldn't get lost. I would guess that we were about three-fourths of the way there when Alice suddenly stopped. I turned to look at her and recognized that blank stare. She was having a vision. I waited until the life returned to her eyes. Just as I was about to speak, she cried out in terror.

"Alice! What did you see?"

* * *

A/N: So yeah, this chapter was short. But I wanted to put their little reconciliation all in one chapter before getting into the big stuff. Please review if you liked it!


	8. Chapter 8

Sorry guys, another short chapter! This was the only way to cut the story logically in my outline. But we're getting closer to the end, so I'm trying to save material for that as well. But look, you get the very rare Edward POV! Yay!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Pssh, I wish I owned Twilight.**

* * *

**Edward POV:**

I watched longingly as Alice dragged Bella away from me into the woods. From Alice's thoughts I could tell she desperately wanted to talk to Bella, so I chose not to follow to give them some privacy.

I was thrilled when Bella said she still loved me. I worried and pretty much expected that she had lost faith in me, but in reality she lost faith in herself. I dreaded knowing that my actions had caused her such self-loathing; if it was anything like mine, than she probably had hated herself from the moment that I left.

I could still see that she was a little cautious accepting my affections, and that was reasonable. I had damaged her badly, and I deserved her every reservation about me. But when my lips touched hers, it was like all had been forgiven, and she kissed me back with as much fervor. I smiled at the memory, staring off into the distance.

"Finally patch things up?"

I looked up to Emmett coming to stand next to me. I nodded, looking back out at the forest. He chuckled.

"Good. I'm glad for you, Edward. Bella is really special," he said.

"Yes, she is. I can't think of anything more radiant," I replied. Emmett scoffed.

"Such a hopeless romantic," he muttered under his breath. I reached over to punch him playfully in the arm, when I heard a soft voice emerge in my mind.

_Getting closer. Almost there, I can smell her..._

I froze. Victoria was nearing, and Bella was off somewhere with Alice.

It was possible that we could attack her and have Alice keep Bella away so she wouldn't get hurt. I called for the others, speaking softly so we wouldn't alert Victoria to our presence. We branched out, spreading ourselves around the campsite so the entire area would be covered. Hopefully, Alice saw this and was taking Bella to safety.

_What's this? Her scent is everywhere, but wait, here's another path..._

I grew alarmed as Victoria seemed to stop moving. I waited for her to make a decision.

_There's their little campsite, I think she went this way..._

Damn it! She started to move down the path that Alice and Bella took earlier. I started running, not even waiting for the others to comprehend what was going on. Bella was in danger, and I needed to get to Victoria before she could do any harm.

The trees were flying past me continuously as I ran. I tried to follow Victoria's path as I saw it in her mind, but I couldn't get too close or I wouldn't be able to surprise her. I tried calculating the point at which I should stop running when a putrid odor filled my senses. I stopped, my eyes darting around the area. The smell was disgusting, and too familiar. Time was racing by me, but I was halted by one thing.

"Come on out, mutt," I called.

_What have you gotten her into this time, bloodsucker?_

A form appeared out of my peripheral, and I whipped around. The same werewolf from earlier was there, eyes locked on me. Jacob Black.

"Excuse me, you're wasting my time. Maybe later I can come back and sort you out," I said, and I turned to run.

_You're not going anywhere. Let me handle this, you've caused Bella enough trouble, _he thought. I winced.

I needed to get to Victoria right away, but I knew that I would have to deal with Jacob first.

* * *

**Bella POV:**

"Alice! What did you see?" I asked.

"Victoria. She's found the tent...and our trail."

My eyes were wide. This wasn't supposed to work out like this. Alice started leading me away from our path.

"Edward's coming. It looks like our ambush won't work right now. We need to get you out," she said, dragging me along. I had no idea where we were going to hide out in the openness.

Alice dragged me a few feet further when all of a sudden, she pulled me behind her back, a growl erupting from her chest.

I looked around, trying to find the source of the danger. A child-like giggle echoed across the path.

"So, you thought you could outrun me," a babyish voice crooned. "You should have know better, fortune teller."

And there, slipping out from the shadows was Victoria. Her fiery red hair moved wildly from the wind. Her clothes were old and tattered, and her feet were bare and muddy. She had an evil smile on her immortal face.

"Finally, I can get my revenge. You stole my James away from me, so I'll take you away from your precious Edward," she said bitterly, stepping forward. "A mate for a mate, eh? Let's see how he likes living eternity without his true love."

Victoria darted quickly to the left, and Alice compensated. Our bodies moved together, me pressed behind Alice's tiny form.

"Oh Victoria, you know that this won't end well. I can see it," Alice shouted across the way. Victoria glared.

"Don't be so sure," she warned, and then suddenly, I was pinned against a tree, Victoria's cold hands grasping at my throat. The sound of boulders crashing into each other echoed in my ears as I gasped for breath. I looked and saw that Alice had been pushed through a couple trees, felled by her force. It seemed that Victoria had figured out that snap decisions were the key to evading Alice's visions.

Victoria lifted me and slammed me back into the tree, the bark cutting into my back. She quickly disappeared from my eyes as Alice ran up behind her and ripped her away from me, casting her into the trees. My back was throbbing painfully; Alice tried to pull me away, but Victoria was already there, ramming her body into Alice's. I cried out, terrified for Alice. Where was Edward?

* * *

A/N: So this story has basically gone from New Moon to Eclipse, skipping all the Volturi drama. Anyway, reviews would be nice!


	9. Chapter 9

Okay guys, so this is the second to last chapter to My Defenses Hit the Ground!! I don't know if I will make a sequel, but I definitely planned the ending so I could if you guys wanted me to. So basically, it's up to you if you want more!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: Why do I still do this? I don't own Twilight.**

* * *

**Edward POV:**

Jacob growled, pacing in a slow circle around me. I was irritated; he was stopping me from getting to Victoria, and each second we wasted was adding to the danger that Bella was in.

"I don't have time for stupid games, mongrel," I spat.

_But you had time to leave Bella drowning in misery, _Jacob thought. I flinched.

"Well, that's something between Bella and myself. But I do wonder, how did you become a werewolf? I thought the gene had disappeared," I said.

_Beats me. I'm still trying to figure this mess out. _Jacob's thoughts trailed off as he started to ponder the path to his current situation. I got ready to move.

"Look, Bella is in danger right now, she needs me," I said, turning to leave.

_I wasn't finished with you yet! _The wind moved around me as I felt Jacob start to lunge after me. I leaped to the left and allowed him to pass me. As he scrambled to a stop, I ran for him and shoved my whole body against his form. The force pushed us into a tree, and I could hear several bones crack within Jacob's body. He whimpered in pain.

"If something happens to Bella because I had to deal with you, I will make sure you regret this moment for the rest of your life, if you live that long," I growled menacingly. I let his body drop to the ground. Refocusing, I turned and ran, trying to pick up Victoria's path once more.

**

* * *

**

**Bella POV:**

Lashing out, Victoria grabbed my left arm and pulled sharply. I screamed as I felt my shoulder becoming dislocated. I fell to the ground, rolling in pain. Alice appeared again, disrupting Victoria's concentration. She danced around, irritating Victoria. She growled and jumped at Alice, narrowly missing. Just as she was about to snatch Alice by the waist, a furious growl sounded throughout the forest. Victoria stopped, then was suddenly pushed out of the way by a fast moving blur. She flew head first into a tree. The blur moved to my side, and I felt a hand caress my face.

"Bella!" an anguished voice cried. My vision started to come into focus.

"Edward," I croaked. The pain in my arm was starting to become numb.

"I'm so sorry, love," he said. His head turned over his shoulder to look at someone. He was shouting commands, but the sound of his voice weaved in and out of a strange static in my ears. I blinked, trying to focus.

"Edward..." I said, getting his attention. His head snapped to me immediately.

"What hurts, love?"

"My arm," I pretty much groaned. His eyes scanned my body, and he noticed the odd angle at which my arm was positioned. His face crumpled.

"It's dislocated," he whispered, almost to himself. Edward's hands stroked my arm softly. "I've got to get you out." He proceeded to carefully lift me up, and as he turned us around I got to see more of the fight.

Jasper and Emmett had arrived and they were tag-teaming it against Victoria. Alice was off to the side, seemingly waiting for someone or something. Her eyes darted to us, and she quickly danced over.

"Carlisle's coming with some supplies. I told her this would be over quickly," Alice said, almost bragging.

The sound of boulders crashing into each other was peppered with Emmett's booming laughter. He and Jasper were throwing Victoria back and forth like a rag doll. Edward carefully gripped me tightly and turned to move us out of the way. Just as he took his first step, however, a loud explosion seemed to come from behind us and I was suddenly out of his arms, falling head first and slamming my head into a large rock. I felt something drip down my face as I tried to see what was happening.

Jasper and Emmett had lost control of Victoria. She must have ran for Edward and slammed into him, knocking me out of his arms. A growl pierced the air. I looked hazily and saw Victoria coming my way, eyes feral and red with hunger. She reached for me, but just as her pale arm got closer, a brown form pushed into her body and launched her away. Edward and the others were yelling, but their voices were all blending together in my eyes. Edward clashed with the brown form, forcing it away, and turned back to Victoria. I could tell that the scent of my spilled blood was making this fight extremely hard on him. The muscles in his neck and back were tense, his jaw clenched with restraint.

Victoria leaped into action, dancing around Edward. They moved quickly, striking sporadically at each other. Every now and then a loud clank would resound whenever one of them hit their mark. My vision started getting fuzzy, but I desperately tried to stay awake so I could keep track of Edward. From far away, I heard Alice call me.

"Bella, Carlisle's here. We're going to move you up further, okay?" her voice was strained.

"No...Edward..." I mumbled, trying to keep my eyes on the fight.

"He'll be fine, Bella. Carlisle, over here!"

There was a pause, and then I was being gently lifted. "Bella, I'm going to have to pop your arm back into place, and it's going to hurt." Carlisle's voice was soothing and calm. "I'm sorry, it's the only way to - " A piercing shriek interrupted his words. The high screech of metal tearing followed quickly after that.

"Alice," Carlisle mumbled. "Help him start the fire."

I heard the sound of snapping and crashing, followed by more metal tearing. I winced at the noise, causing a new wave of pain from my shoulder. I clenched my teeth to keep from screaming.

The noise started to die down, and soon all there was left was a gentle crackling. A strange, sweet smell filled the air, and in my fuzzy vision it seemed a dark purple haze covered the sky. I sensed someone stop and sit by me.

"Bella," Edward said, picking me up gingerly and holding me against him. I could feel him and hear him and smell him; I knew that he was alright. He was here with me, safe. I tried to hug him, but my arm wouldn't allow me to move. Edward saw what I was trying to do and pulled me closer.

"Bella, Carlisle is going to fix your arm, but it will hurt. Are you ready?" he murmured in my ear. I nodded against him. I felt Carlisle step up to us. His cold hands grabbed my shoulder and arm. I turned my head into Edward's chest, breathing in his scent. Faintly, I heard Carlisle count to five, and then a searing pain shot through my body. I screamed into Edward's shirt, my eyes watering. He shushed me as Carlisle wrapped my arm in a sling, his voice rumbling deep in his throat. I sat there, clenching his shirt in my fist, in pain but relieved that he was okay. He kissed the top of my head.

"Let's go home," he said, and he lifted me so we were both standing. I leaned against him as he led the way. I turned to look at the sky, a column of purple smoke interrupting the clouds.

* * *

A/N: Awww! Hee hee. So stay tuned for the last chapter!


	10. Chapter 10

Alright guys, here it is *sniff sniff* the end of My Defenses Hit the Ground. I can't thank you all enough for the wonderful reviews I've gotten; they encouraged me whenever I doubted myself. I've left this story somewhat open-ended just in case I make a sequel, but again, that is all up to you! Thanks for reading, and now the short but sweet conclusion!!

-MissSingItAll

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.**

**

* * *

**

**Bella POV:**

(1 week later)

"Edward? Where are you?" I called in a half whisper. I was standing in the darkness of my room, searching blindly. I felt a cold arm wrap around my waist.

"Right here," he said, placing a kiss on my shoulder. I smiled. _As it should be, _I thought. He guided me to my bed, where I took care to lay down gently. My arm was still sore, and Charlie just about had a heart attack when he saw me come back looking like I escaped a war zone. He ordered that I stay away from camping, but there was a playful glint in his eye when he said it. I think he could see the change in behavior I had made, now that Edward was back.

Edward stroked the side of my face as he lay next to me. "How's your arm?" he asked.

"It's much better," I replied. I listened to the sound of our breathing before speaking again. "I love you."

"I love you, Bella," he said. I couldn't help the words that came out of my mouth.

"Really?" I asked. He tensed, and I could only imagine the look of agony on his face.

"Bella, I've never been more sure of anything in my life. I'll do anything to make you believe that, I swear."

"I believe you," I said. I snuggled closer into his arms. He calmed down.

"Sometimes it's just hard for me to believe it," I continued.

"Believe it, Bella. Truly, I do love you." Edward's voice dropped to a gentle whisper. "Sleep now, love."

"'Kay," I mumbled, already exhausted. He chuckled, and then, like always, he hummed my lullaby, easing me gently to sleep.

* * *

A/N: Aw, doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? Ha, I crack myself up. Anyway, thanks so much for reading and if you want more, maybe I can work something out. :)


End file.
